Speak Memory Chapter Seven: Part 3

In this scene Nabokov describes a short romance he had as a child with a girl named Colette. In a way, Colette was Nabokov's Annabelle when relating Speak Memory to Lolita. Just as Humbert recalled falling in love as a child on vacation at the beach, so does Nabokov. Nabokov writes, "I met Colette, I knew at once that this was the real thing. Colette seemed to me so much stranger than all my other chance playmates at Biarritz!" (149). I wonder if Nabokov's childhood romance was inspiration for the character Annabelle in Lolita. The similarities between the two girls seem all too obvious. Nabokov's love for Colette is an example of innocent infatuation. He talks about how he had a gold coin which in his head was enough money to support them if they were to run off together. The simplicity of this love and the fact that there is no fear of heartbreak of getting hurt because it is not real love, makes this part of the book so memorable. It is interesting to look at life as we grow up and how complicated things get. And then to look back at our childhoods and the simplicity and think how we miss it. The whole time I was reading this I could not stop picturing Humbert and his memories of being a child. And also, my own memories as a child playing with other children on the playground. As well as my short romances when I was young and how "in love" you can feel even if that is not real love. This part of the book was one of the warmest memories of Nabokov, recalling young love and it makes him extremely relatable.

Lo and H.H's argument

"You do not understand me. You will never understand me! Why must I have all these rules. As if I don't already do everything you ask. I'll show you. You can't have my entire life. You don't own me you know.  Carl and Al find me attractive. I know that they would love to kiss me on my very mouth. Let me be a child, just once. Let me go to the roller rink and go to the movies with people my age.. You are depriving me of every good natured thing that comes with being a young girl. You are a crook and a lousy father! You murdered my mother and now you are slowly killing me!"

"Hush, hush Lo. This is all nonsense. It is a father's duty to protect their daughters. I am doing this for your best interest. I am doing it out of love."

Just looking at his smug face made me sick. I scampered off and slammed the door, not before I looked him in the eye and squinted as if trying to see through his dark soul. I thought to myself, "I will win this. I'll show him." It is not that I am particularly fancy of these boys. After all, none of them are really in my league. They are all young virgins and I am a step above the rest. But it is not about that. It is not about the actual boys or the experiences I am missing out on. It is the fact that Hum is being so darn selfish and depriving me of my general rights. I am tired of being cooped up with him all day.

Sitting on my bed after recovering from my minor meltdown. I devised a plan..
I would tell Hum that I am not understanding math as well as I would want too. And have arranged to meet with my teacher after class this week. When he suggests that he shall tutor me, I will simply say that he is too much of a distraction and that I want to focus all my energy on mathematics and not get sidetracked by other matters. I will throw in a few compliments here and there and I should be on my way to some unchaperoned time après l'école.Then I can roam the streets with other children my age. And perhaps.. even spend some time with boys. Ha! He will never know.

The Refrigerator Awakes

Nabokov wrote The Refrigerator Awakes shortly after he emigrated to the United States in 1940. Following his construction of the poem, it was published in The New Yorker in 1942. When reading this piece I tried to keep the fact that he was an emigrant in mind. It hones in on the idea of stereotypical America. As a foreigner, the American Dream or American family life that was prevalent in the 40s must of been new to Nabokov. Reading over the poem, I decided that in parts, it is an assessment of American culture through the household item of the refrigerator. Which, is something that is in every home and necessary. The idea that American culture revolves around the kitchen and then looking closely at the center of this: the fridge. I am not entirely sure of the meaning of this poem but I did find multiple similarities with his novel Lolita. The eloquent language is used both in this poem and Lolita. Nabokov's writing style makes any subject matter worth reading whether it be about a normal household item or the molestation of a young girl by her step father. This may be a shot in the dark but I compared the refrigerator to Humbert Humbert in several different ways. In the beginnnig of the poem, Nabokov writes:

Crash!
And if darkness could sound, it would sound like this
          giant
waking up in the torture house, trying to die
and not dying, and trying
not to cry and immediately crying
that he will, that he will, that he will do his best
to adjust his dark soul to the pressing request
of the only true frost

I took this to be a metaphor for H.H. in the way that he too has this utter darkness inside himself. At the end of the poem, the refrigerator is described as being a God and holding all these wonderful foods. And plays a key role in the house. Just as Humbert Humbert thought he was handsome and above those around him. Yet, the reader knows the deeds he is doing are awful and that he is a twisted man. The fridge is the same in this sense. It is cold and frozen on the inside. Yet, thinks highly of itself because it contains so many wonderful items. It comes off to be this mighty, white, god-like object, just as H. H. first appeared to Charlotte Haze. He was in sorts a knight in shining armor. 

lolita post: psychoanalysis

At the end of the novel, Humbert Humbert finally gets the chance to kill Quilty. And although he succeeds in this, he draws it out much longer than he needed to. The reason he does this is because he wants Quilty to know what he has done, he wants him to feel bad and ask for forgiveness. Humbert Humbert says, "It was high time I destroyed him, but he must understand why he was being destroyed" (297). In his killing of Quilty, H.H. is essentially killing off his guilt. Everything that he frames Quilty for doing is exactly what he has done to Lolita. He blames Quilty of taking advantage of Lolita and engaging in sexual activities with a minor but that is just what he has done. This made me think of the psychoanalysis of the character H.H. He is so deeply flawed that it is hard for him to even see himself in this light. This comes out in the end when he murders Quilty and how he goes about it. Nabokov does not agree with or understand the profession of psychiatry. Yet, he has created this character that at times seems so easy to analyze.

The Road to Lolita

I found it interesting why Alfred Appel Jr thought Lolita became such a famous novel and why it has stuck around so long. Despite the immoral story line, the reason the novel was such a success was not so much about what was going on in it but more so how it was described. At the end of this journal, Alfred writes, "the prodigious artistic merit of the final result is due not to what is said but how it is said" (31). The ability for Nabokov to captivate his reader and make them fall in love with a story that is so morally wrong is why he is such a great writer. I've written about that in other posts but it just seems to keep coming back up. Nabokov's way with words is alluring and makes his subject matter positive even if it is not. For example, at times when I was reading Lolita and Humbert Humbert was describing her, I would forget that she was a little girl. His descriptions were so delicate and paints a clear picture in the reader's mind. Even his description of his love for her made me at times forget that this love was between an adult and a child and was therefore wrong. As beautiful as his writing is, it's almost deceitful. It's like a game. He can write about the most horrid situation: sex between an older man and a young child and yet the way he formulates his descriptions makes it beautiful. That is disturbing in a sense but just shows his talent as a writer.

The Annotated Lolita Post 6

My initial research question relates to the psychoanalysis of the character Humbert Humbert. Throughout the novel, Humbert Humbert is constantly defying any explanations for his actions towards Lolita. He is almost mocking the readers desire to give reason to his behavior. We think that his mother's death at a young age may have affected his respect for women. Or that the desertion of women in his own life (his mother, aunt, Valeria) led him to do the things he did. But Nabokov does not want the reader to analyze Humbert Humbert in this way. He wants us to view the character as this deeply troubled person but not as a case study. Humbert Humbert is unique and not like every pedophile. In fact, he even goes as far to say he is not a pedophile. This is because he does not go after every little girl and has respect for the average child. His lust for Lolita is justified because she is a nymphet and also she did not resist him. It is known that Nabokov was opposed to psychiatry, particularly the ways of Freud, and it is with this novel that he criticizes it. To Humbert, his attraction to Lolita is not some sick disorder but rather this uncontrollable, pure love. And love, justified all his behavior because in the end that's all that mattered. He had loved Lolita with all his heart. When thinking back to his times with Lolita, H. H. wrote, "I loved you. I was a pentapod monster, but I loved you. I was despicable and brutal, and turpid, and everything, maid je t'aimais, je t'aimais! And there were times when I knew how you felt, and it was hell to know it, my little one. My Lolita girl, brave Dolly Schiller" (285). At this part of the novel, it is hard not to feel bad for Humbert Humbert. He has lost the love of his life even though we know that love was morally wrong.

The Annotated Lolita Post 5

I found it interesting how quickly things progressed in this reading. Out of nowhere, this man begins stalking Lolita and H. H. and in the end he has stolen her. Humbert Humbert's desperation is very apparent in these last chapters. All he wants is Lolita back with him but he has to solve this mystery by himself. He cannot go to the police because that could expose his secret. In the middle of the reading, Humbert Humbert starts noticing this new follower. And the reader starts to question if Humbert Humbert is making this up or if it is actually happening. There are many instances where Humbert Humbert's sanity is questionable. For example, one night when he was staying at a motel with Lolita Humbert Humbert recalling the night said, "I felt sure somebody was tapping at the door of our cabin, and I flung it open, and noticed two things- that I was stark naked and that, white-glistening in the rain-dripping darkness, there stood a man holding before his face the mask of Juting Chin, a grotesque sleuth in the funnies. He emitted a muffled guffaw and scurried away, and I reeled back into the room, and fell asleep again, and am not sure even to this day that the visit was not a drug-prvoked dream" (217).  From then on, Humbert Humbert keeps having these visuals and it makes the reader question if he is sane. This leads me to my first research question which touches on the psychoanalysis of Humbert Humbert. We are constantly trying to figure out Humbert Humbert and explain his attraction to Lolita and the reasoning behind his actions.